Friday, April 13, 2012

Waiting on the Lord

I'm back.
I was taking full advantage of the school holidays.
Went camping for 12 - yes TWELVE - days!
Amazing.
But I am so happy to be HOME!

What to do about weight-loss....

A big part of me wants control.
Planning.
Back-up plans.
Menu plans.
Aggressive & unrealistic plans.
Just to make sure I'll get back on track.

And there's a big part of me trying to talk me down.
I have a fear of failure.
I have tried and tried and tried to lose weight.
I have failed!
And now I feel like any new "plan" I implement will fail.
Because, well, honestly -
it always has.
I got down to 142 lbs once -
I can't remember how anymore.
Because even after that total success, I wasn't happy...
or something came up...
bad season of life - holidays
(I do remember that number came in November.)
And after that, I changed plans.
And now -
I've tried everything under the sun.
And nothing has worked.

And then... there's another big part of me saying
"Stop trying to control everything!"
And THAT is the voice I want to listen to today.
I want to trust God to help me get healthy & fit.
I am looking forward to the day where when people ask,
"Wow! Looking great! How did you do it?"
I can answer:
"Actually? Honestly? I stopped trying to control everything, I prayed and trusted God to help me do it, and He did!"
That would be awesome.
Because the alternative would be so worldly.
"I followed Michelle Bridges plan!" or
"I joined a weight-loss FB group." or
"I never ate more than 1200 calories/day, and exercised 6days/week."

I want the Spiritual answer!
I have to start trusting God.
Heaven help me.

But... if God does give me a worldly answer,
(ie. yes, go ahead and do bootcamp every day)
then, I will trust Him in that too.
But until I hear from Him,
I'll be waiting on The Lord.

:D
Happy.

2 comments:

Miss Directions said...

I'm not religious so I'm probably not the best person to be commenting on this post.

But I want to remind you about that story about the guy who wanted to win the lotto and prayed to do so every day. When he died without winning he asked God 'Why?' and God asked him 'Why didn't you buy a ticket??'

Having faith is a very powerful thing, not only in God but in yourself. He may be able to give you guidance, or pick you up when you fall, but at the end of that day, it's all up to you to buy that ticket.

And remember that more than anytyhing it's about conisitency.

Christine said...

I know what you mean about trying to control everything..I think the key is controlling the things you can and rolling with the things you can't. You can control your food intake...you can't always control life circumstances. So, control your food intake, and when you get the urge to use food to soothe your emotions...turn to God instead. (says the woman who is struggling right now..lol) Maybe I will take my own advice. Hugs. Hang in there.